Surrounded by greens and blues
An idyllic landscape
In a fantasized utopia
That is almost real
It brushes the soft tips of my fingers
Like a feather
Like a dream I just barely remember

Even near this paradise
A life-giving generous oasis
My mind looks into mirrors upon mirrors
The dark side reflected
The shadow that is my own face
Dissatisfaction creeps
My form
My figure
My function
My forced reality
My fearful asymmetry
Futile, it seems

When occupied
I am a goddess
I am purple personified
Elegant, regal, spectacular
Fascinating and fascinated
For a quick, subtle moment
The mind is idle
Then, all at once focused and unfocused
Blurred memories, dreams, and speculations

The dammed tears
Threaten their damned barriers
Fueled by a past that cannot be helped
A future that is unknown
A present that cannot be embraced


The sun rises
I am smiling again
I have forgotten
For the moment
The things no one remembers
The things no one yet knows
I am happy

Sunflowers bloom in the distance
I am black
I am yellow
I am wistful
I am hopeful
I exist
I am
I am not

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